Falling Sky

I have accepted my defeat
Nothing more is left to confide
The mountains tall will speak of us
The stars surrounding will survive
But the time has come for us to part
Good Bye to you and have a good life

Leave your chamber
My princess come
Your voyage is set for sail at-one
Seven years , we pined for long
Been part of many a minstrel song
Though now we meet, we must away
For on this earth it is the last day

The city is empty
The minarets shake
A thousand miles you must take
Don’t  wait for me
I won’t come
Nothing for me is now undone

You know better, don’t regress
Death is but a new dawn
In heaven and hell I now confess
We will be together before long
Look at the falling sky above
Look at the stars as they glow bright
The gods above are also sad
The heavens have a fight

 Belated but our love was strong
In heaven we together belong
I’ll wait for you to live your life
Be merry, happy and rejoice
You were my only treasure-beloved
To lose you to gods is my greatest strife
But the time has come for us to part
Good Bye to you and have a good life

Being Human

Since this is a personal blog and personal blogging is mostly about expressing opinions, I realize now that I have had no opinion posts. Writing opinions is tricky though because of the diversity in human thoughts. People don’t want to believe anything contradictory to what they have learned in life. It does not fit their understanding of the ‘universe’. My small reader group, however, gives me freedom. Most of my readers until now are from a group I know outside the blogosphere and so I have faith that they won’t mind spending some time on my broodings. And I deal with a highly philosophical question today, a question that has perplexed mankind for long and caused a great divide between the two genders of this highly evolved species on Earth- ‘Are men dog?’
I come from a middle class Indian family because of which my upbringing had been in a locality that had an abundance of street dogs. I grew up feeding the malnourished street dogs from an early age and have great affection for their kind. If I may add, I have found dogs to be among the best animals in our world. They are faithful, coordinating, and live in gangs which have much in common with the human idea of society. The more glorified families of vertebrates such as Lions, for instance, have very less similarity with our ways of life. But let’s not indulge into too much science here, science ruins philosophy.

Now that I have introduced my feelings for dogs, let me start the comparison between the two aforesaid species. The lives of both, men and dogs, begins with training. We take birth and are taught what to do and what not to. Mothers are our first teachers and make us what we are when we get into adolescence. It may not be comfortable to those grown up now (lions in their imagination) but their fate was decided by the kind of training they got from their parents. Our childhood forms us, whether we like it or not. Each little decision we take determines our future and there is no escaping this reality. In comparison, dogs too receive their training from their mothers. For a street dog, it is mostly about learning to cross the street, killing mice and chasing cats. In conjunction, they learn to be faithful to those households that feed them. I won’t include the dogs who live in posh houses, drive in luxury cars and eat pedigree. No sir, they are a disgrace to the dog kind. An analogy in humans will be the kids of overly rich parents who get sent to expensive boarding schools which ‘train’ them to ‘make a man’ of themselves. To me, that’s a short cut. That was not how mammals are supposed to evolve, not even ‘lions’. Let your mother have the credit of forming you, that is the least they deserve. One of my my favorite saying is from the novel Catch-22 which goes something like:

XYZ “had a poor start, he came from a good family”

                                   (But maybe more on that in a later post)

The next stage in our lives is that of adulthood. It’s the age where we learn the importance of independence leaving the cocoon we have been sheltered in. The immediate reaction to which is reflected in adolescence with identity crisis. Humans seek affection of those nearby. A need for recognition and dependence. So is the case with dogs. They search for appropriate masters for themselves and dedicate their lives in service for little in return. Sleepless nights spent in service of someone who bothers as much about you. It’s a pathetic life from the outsight, but certainly more human than wearing ‘Being Human’ t-shirts and drinking alcohol in parks or, just to be a bit harsher because I don’t like his films, running over people asleep on the sidewalk.
A funny thing about adulthood is that we often get labeled ‘dogs’ for reasons quite unrelated to dog-behavior. Dogs are faithful and would rather sacrifice their lives for their masters.

Now moving on to death, I try to stand against another saying that calls a bad death as ‘dying a dog’s death’. This is a strong statement, and because it is strong, it falls harder. To state it outright- we all die a dog’s death. If we die early in life, we have unfulfilled goals, unfulfilled desires and often have deep regrets for having lived our lives the way we had. Emotions drag us down to the level of animals. Getting killed in a car accident is no better than the death of a dog that you see getting run over by a truck. Contrarily, most probably the dog would have been happier. Death in old age is no better for the fear of loneliness. I have not yet had a personal experience with that age but have observed that the hokum of independence goes away for most of us. Interdependence is most evident to us when we have no one to care for us. Make no mistakes; we all die alone- ‘a dog’s death’. Or maybe even worse.

Let me sum it all up with an example. I had a very poor show at the exam today. I have a habit of studying just the last night before the exam but sleep got better of me this time and I got into the exam hall with less than 2 hours of studies. To add to my misery, the invigilator in our room was a beautiful teacher who listened to music over her earphones while governing the exam. And to restate for those not regular at following my blog, I have been having latent feelings of what I feel is love for a girl I don’t know well enough. Blaming my mammalian genes, when I first saw the teacher my reaction was that of a dog. She was beautiful even in her late 30s and to and spoke with careful sweetness in her words. I spent the first hour thinking of what I have written in front of you. When the gray matter got back to me, I invoked my dog nature of faithfulness. Like everyone else, I like to live like a lion, or an eagle. But as said before, emotions drag us to the level of animals. I could have contrasted dogs and humans with the concept of self-awareness and explained the reason why human race is such a success but it would make the post too long and uninteresting. Just to touch upon the idea though, close your eyes and imagine yourself outside your body. With your copied soul, stand in the corner of the room and look at yourself sitting, reading this article. You should be able to perform this exercise effortlessly, and be able to draw conclusions about yourself. This gift is unique to humans and one of the reasons why our society has been a success.

A bad ending ruins half the effort but unfortunately, I can think of no other way to conclude this post other than an reassurance that being called a dog is not as bad as it may seem. There are worse things you could be called. Printed t-shirts are the worst things that happened to the fashion industry the previous century and next time you see someone wearing that ‘being human’ shirt, try judging if he really behaves as he proclaims. The answer in most cases (I have done the experiment) is no.

GK Quiz

These are the set of questions I set for GK quiz conducted on 10th of September, 2011, in ITER. These questions however were never selected because the world is not perfect and therefore I am releasing it on the internet. The questions are centered towards India and Indians but I hope the general audience finds it as much useful.

1. The first king of the Mauryan Empire dynasty defeated the Hellenistic kingdom in the plains of Punjab in 305BC. His guru had been a great philosopher and economist in India economics. Name the university at which the guru taught.
Answer: Taxila; Kautilya (or Chanakya ) had hidden and studied in Taxila after the Nada kingdom ruler had murdered his father Chanak. Later, Kautilya became the principle of Taxila.
2. Mahayana Buddhism was proliferated into China, Korea and Japan during the 1stCentury of this millennia. Name the Indian ruler of Kushana Dynasty credited for the internationalization of Buddhism.
Answer: Kanishka; It is unclear whether Kanishka himself converted, his decisions such as -translation of Buddhist works into Chinese led to the expansion of Buddhism in Asia.
3. Samarqand in Uzbekistan is the oldest city in Central Asia. The attempt to conquer this city had greatly weakened an Indian dynasty whose last famous emperor suffered great loss at the hands of the Marathas. Name the Dynasty.

Answer: The Mughal Dynasty; Shah Jahan attempted to conquer Samarqand as an ancestoral home but was uncessful. Aurengzeb, the last famous emperor of Mughal dynasty, incurred military and economic loss in an attempt to win the Marathas.

4. The Carnatic wars of 18th century are considered the main political cause for the annexation of India by the British. Name the two countries involved in this war.

Answer: England and France; the rise of French military caused a security threat to England and gave rise to worldwide Anglo-French conflict of the 18th century. India being a lucrative trading partner for both countries became a battleground for the conflict.

5. The alleged death of Subhash Chandra Bose has been an issue of debate for long. Justice Mukherjee’s report of 2005, discredits Bose’s cause for death to be a plane crash as maintained by the government. What was the destination of the crashed plane?

Answer: Tokyo, Japan.

6. Constructed between 1238-1250 CE, this temple dedicated to the Sun god is a mix of Orissan and Dravidian styles of architecture. Name the king who sanctioned this temple.

Answer: Narsimhadev I of Eastern Ganga Dynasty ; The temple is Konark Temple.


People :

1. Born in France, I am regarded as the father of science fiction. My best known works ‘Around the world in Eighty Days’ and ‘Journey to the center of the earth’ have been converted into major motion picture and have inspired a lot of author form the genre. Who am I?

Answer: Jules Verne;

2. I am a social activist born in Bhingar, Bombay. My indefinite hunger strike on 5thApril, 2011 caused national unrest against corruption. Lovingly called Anna by the people, what is my birth name?

Answer: Kisan Baburao Hazare;

3. Born as the great granddaughter of Conrad Hilton, founder of Hilton Hotels, I am well known for my stupidity on camera and my lavish lifestyle. The 2008 parody Presidential campaign video by me garnered 7 million views in two days. Who am I?

Answer: Paris Hilton;

4. A Scottish physician and writer, my works mostly dealt with science fiction, historical novels and plays. My most noted works were based on the exploits detective Sherlock Holmes. What is my name?

Answer: Sir Arthur Conan doyle

5. The book ‘The Poverty of India’, published in 1876, for the first time was able to draw attention to economic conditions of India under the British. The writer of the book studied at the Elphinstone college in Mumbai and became a well know figure in Indian nationalism. Name the author.

Answer: Dadabahi naroji; Born to parsi parents in 1825, Dadabhai went on to become the ‘grand old man of India’ and was the spiritual leader for the generation of nationalist leaders that included Mahatma Gandhi.

6. Awarded Bharat Ratna posthumously in 1998, his call for ‘Total Revolution’ lead to nationwide protests and ignited political instability in the country. His biography, written by an eminent writer of Hindi literature, Ramvriksha Benipuri, is named after him. Name the politician.

Answer: Jayprakash Narayan; Also known as ‘Loknayak’, J.P Narayan enjoyed the moral support of youth and was thus able to fiercely oppose Indira Gandhi in 1970s leading to emergency on June 25, 1975. Ramvirksha Benipuri was a close friend of JP and brought out his biography by the name ‘Jayprakash’.


1. If I am standing at the border of China’s largest province and the city of Astana is the capital city of this largest landlocked country, which country am I in?

Answer: Kazakhstan; is the 9th largest country in the world and the largest land locked country. It is bordered by China’s largest Xinjiang Uygur on the east.

2. Southeastern Europe ends in a peninsula bounded on the east by the Black and Aegean seas, on the south by the Mediterranean Sea and on the west by the Adriatic and Ionian seas. What is the name of the Peninsula?

Answer: Balkan Peninsula; comprises the countries Croatia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Serbia, etc.

3. If lake Superior is the westernmost and largest of the five great lakes, which is the easternmost and the smallest?

Answer: Lake Ontario; Some 311 km (193 mi) long and up to about 85 km (about 53 mi) wide, the lake covers an area of 19,010 sq km (7,340 sq mi).

Play it safe OR go for a kill:

1. In 1971 the firm that invented denim blue jeans in 1873, received the Coty Fashion Critics’ Award, the highest award of the American fashion industry because of the status attained by blue jeans in the 60s and 70s. Name the company that invented denim blue jeans.

Answer: Levis Strauss & Co. invented blue jeans in 1873.

2. Delhi re-attained its position as the center of political power when it became the capital city of the Mughal Empire in 1638. Name the Mughal ruler that relocated his capital from Agra to Red Fort in Delhi.

Answer: Shah Jahan; the construction for the Red Fort(Lal Qila) was begun in 1639 and completed by 1648.

3. Anti-Semitism, i.e. the political, social and economic agitation and activities directed against Jews led to the burning of a lot of their places of worship. What is the Jewish temple called?

Answer: Synagogue; it serves both as a place of worship and as a communal center of the Jewish congregation.

4. Built for the king Suryavarman II in 12th century as his state temple and capital city, this is the world’s largest religious building first hindu, dedicated to god Vishnu and then Buddhist. This temple has now become a symbol of Cambodia appearing on its national flag. Name the temple.

Answer: The Angkor Wat temple; built in earl 12th century, the temple was built with high classical style of Khmer arhchitecture.

5. If gynephobia stands for an irrational and pathological fear for women, gynandrous describes flowers such as orchids that have pistils and stamens united in a column, etymologically, what does androgynous stand for?

Answer: Someone who has both male and female parts; from latin- andro=”man”, gune=’woman’. Androgynous is obtained by flipping the two parts of gynandrous.

6. Hammurabi is remembered for his codification of the laws governing Babylonian life in the “Code of Hammurabi” and for his powerful regime. What was the capital city of his empire?

Answer: Babylonia; though inhabited before the Babylonian Dynasty under Hammurabi, the city gained much from the power and extent of the dynasty.

7. Two of the longest rivers of Russia form the largest river system in asia, which is also the fourth largest river system in world. Name any one of the two rivers.

Answer: Ob and Irtysh; There reivers flow 5410 km north from western China through western Siberia to the Arctic Ocean.

8. In the words of its original philosopher, nihilism was described as:
“What I am doing is to recount the history of the next two centuries. I am describing what is coming, what can no longer come in any other form: the rise of nihilism.”
Name the philosopher.

Answer: Friedrich Nietzsche; born in 1844, Nietzsche went on to become one ofthe most prominent thinkers of the 19th century. His key ideas were ‘the death of god’, ‘will to power’ and ‘Nihilism’.


9. If ‘Macbeth’ was the last of the ‘four great tragedies’ written by Shakespeare, name the hero of the first of the ‘four great tragedies’.

Answer: Hamlet from the play Hamlet; the other two tragedies were Othello and King Lear.

10. Ramachandra Guha is a noted Indian writer in the field of environment, history and cricket. His book on modern Indian history published in 2007 was chosen as the book of the year by the Wall Street Journal, The Economist and Outlook. Name the book.

Answer: India After Gandhi; published by HarperCollins, the book stays at list of best sellers even today because of its comprehensiveness and interactive style of telling history.

11. Born on planet Krypton, he was rocketed to Earth by his scientist father before the destruction of his home planet. Name this superhero form DC comics.

Answer: Superman

12. One of Jhumpa Lahiri’s novels ‘The Namesake’ was adapted into the popular film by the same name receiving much critical acclaim. What is the name of her first collection of short stories that received the 2000 Pulitzer Prize for Fiction?

Answer: Interpreter of Maladies; A collection of 9 short stories, and has sold over 15 million copies world-wide.

The section on Geography is not complete as I could not find the questions anymore. The questions were designed to be easy to answer if the listener is attentive and therefore can be used at high-school level. The formatting has gotten unorganized because of copying the content form word document to wordpress. Hope the content is useful to you.

A Cosmopolite in Cafe Coffee Day

======================Scene I======================

Normally, I wouldn’t type in afternoon after lunch. The food induced sleep does not do justice to the author or the reader. But because I have an exam tomorrow, a free evening may do me good. Also, I have always had a passion for telling stories and the temptation of telling stories is hard to resists.

The story starts with me and a friend standing outside the hostel door waiting for the ambulance at 7:30 am on a Monday morning. He had been showing signs of appendicitis for last 3 hours and the hotel attendant had been too sleepy to open hs door for half an hour. I decided to accompany him because for my reluctance to attend a  lab on Signal Processing. My friend, lets call him X to maintain anonymity, had not been interested in class room studies much and a gall bladder operation would be more interesting to him than the test in power systems which he gladly missed that day. When the ambulance arrived after an hour wait, I was pleased to find it preoccupied with two not-so-sick girls form the girls hostel who looked pretty in their sleepy eyes but annoyed because the driver had driven the van into the ‘boys’ hostel campus.

With some effort, I was able to help my friend climb the van which seemed too small for a company of four. Perhaps because opposites attract, we were able to be comfortable in that tight dungeon. Despite his pain, X too was cheerful as the rush of morning air had been hard to get ever since he came to hostel three years ago. An early morning ride with girls was a bonus for both of us. The curly haired girl sitting beside me looked to be 20 years old with a sweet smile and an unwashed face. She might just have woken up to go for a morning jog. Her friend sitting opposite me was the odd one out among the patients. She was pretty with a button nose and dove eyes. Her dress kempt and face glowing. An enthusiastic observer might even tell that she had taken time to apply lipstick and the mild smell of perfume early in the cold morning soothed everyone.

The day had started off beautifully with sun just warming up everything visible and guiding the birds to their exploration. Humans were still not out of bed though, and that is why we were able to drive faster in the scanty roads. Once the initial gush of blood was over, I tried comforting X with some consolations.

“Exam bahut door hai abhi, zayada problem ho ghar chale jaana. Chinta kyou karta hai?”

“Pehle se aath back-log hai, ghar mein ghusne bhi milega aab”, he said in a low voice with an intention to joke.

“Kyou aisa kya problem hai tumko?”, came a question form the girl sitting beside me who had been mostly quite through the journey.

“Shayad appendix hai, kuch din se dard zayada hi badh gaya hai”, replied X.

“Zayada Wikipedia padh ke hoshiyaar mat bano, pehle doctor ko dikha lo”, I tried acting the cooler one.”Aap log kaha jaa rahi hai? Waise mera naam Rohit hai aur yeh bimaar mahashay hai X”

“I am going to the dentist, not that anyone cares”, replied the girl opposite me in a slightly sharp tone.

“Ritika! Ritika has been having tooth ache since Friday. And they won’t give special compensation to the sick at hostel. My name is Priyanka by the way.”, said the girl who I now recognized as Priyanka.

“A sour mouth leading to sour words? Don’t worry, it’ll go away, your teeth don’t look too bad”, said X.

After this there was a long silence during which the ambulance raced pass cows roaming the highway without fear. The mist was lifting by now and the recycled air inside was warm to comfort. Midway the journey, the girls started talking in a language unfamiliar to both me and my sick friend who was now busy drawing images with vapor drops on the glass windows. I have always found listening to foreign languages very intriguing- the joy one gets when someone speaks one hindi or english word and he can solve live puzzle. I was attempting the brain teaser when Priyanka suddenly mentioned “Tihar”. To those unfamiliar with this abode of goons in India, Tihar is a jail in Delhi. Coincidentally ‘Tihar’ rhymes with ‘Bihar’- a state in eastern India which has been long infamous for criminal activities.  Ritika, the girl with the tooth ache, made the small mistake of  listening ‘Tihar’ as ‘Bihar’. The irony was that it fit the statement too awkwardly which went:

“All these criminals should be sent to ‘Tihar'(‘Bihar’)”.

To this unintended hormonal rush by her friend, Ritika replied:

“Yes. I don’t really know why there is such a rush of people form the state. It is increasing crime rate throughout the country you know?”, she said, this time in English.

This brought X back form his early morning doodling. He came from the state of Bihar and technically, so did I. I was born in the state of Bihar which later got dvided into Bihar and Jharkhand 10 years ago because of the demand of Santhalis. Outsiders, however, made little effort in understanding the technicalities. Having spent around 9 years of my life outside my hometown of Jamshedpur, I have had a habit of ignoring this foolery of people. X, who had been rather uninterested in his habitat until now spread his lips joyfully.

“Please don’t say anything inciting”, he said,”Rohit here has got psychiatric condition of psychopathy”.I did not know how to respond to this unanticipated situation. Should I be depressed? That would be too strange because I had been smiling my whole way. Should I be angry? At whom? When I could not think of any appropriate response, I faked a broad smile which I now think was sufficient. People often go on the words of others than their own judgment.

“Is that why you are going to the doctor?”, asked Ritika.

“Yes… umm, yes, that’s why I am accompanying him. He has been too aggressive  in the last few days.”, answered X on my behalf.

“Maybe it’s the effect of the culture in Jharkhand. You know, a lot of them practice voodoo.”taught Ritika.

X smiled. The situation was getting out my understanding and if I had let it develop further, the cat would have been out of the bag. I pinched X hard and in a manner everyone saw it. The girls, now scared as holy goat, took it as a sign of aggression and quieted down.

The rest of the journey can be expressed easily as I had to go to the psychiatrist and act with Priyanka because the dental and psychiatry departments were on the same corner of the hospital. Also Rs 100/- for the medicine.


================= SCENE II =======================

Five days after the above episode, I saw Ritika at a coffee bar outside my hostel. She was standing alone with a cup in her hand as the show in old movies. When I approached the stall for a cup, she gave me a gentle smile.

“How have you been Rohit?”

“Good as a grave. And your coffee tells me you are recovering?”, I asked trying to act less of a sociopath.

“Yes, it’s better now. The doctor advised me not to drink anything hot but I don’t care.”

From a close look, she was the kind of girl I would like go out with one day. She was charming, true to herself and beautiful. Also, she could hold the glass in the most girly way possible.

“You know… that day in car, I was just acting….. I really didn’t need psychiatric help. I am sorry now, though.” I said, the hormones getting better of my reason.

“And you want me to believe you now?”she said looking rather angry and annoyed.

“Actually yes, but my brains say you won’t accept it, so I don’t know how to respond”, I said.

“I saw your facebook profile. Why would you call yourself ‘Rohit Vijay Sharma’?”

“Don’t know.. maybe identity crisis or maybe I need some counselling sessions, but I assure you a mental case is still far away!”

She smiled slightly at this and the bar attendant smiled seeing her smile.

“How do you know marwari?”

“How do you know that?”

“I saw your facebook page, you know a lot for my friends are marwari.”

“Well, I don’t write everything true on Facebook, but ancestrally I am a marwari. Have you been stalking me?”

“Not stalking you, I just wanted to see what the social life of a retard looks like. It must have been that X, you know, these Biharis, they always have a tricky mind.”she said.

“Come 0n! It has not got anything to do with him. You looked so beautiful that morning, you drove him to lye!”said I.

“You have the audacity to flirt with me!You are an outsider here, how dare you?”, she said in a girly bellow with a slight smile telling that it was only a joke.

“Outsider??And I am not flirting, please, just asking for sometime when we can both go out together… how about for a cup of coffee next Wednesday?”, I asked seeing her happy at the moment.

“I don’t know… my parents asked me to avoid guys form Bihar and Jharkhand. Event the girls in hostel talk so ugly!”

It was difficult to see her condescension in front of her but we swapped numbers and  decided to go out next Wednesday.


===================Scene III========================

I had been waiting for 15 minutes in the cafe when she arrived. It was evening and dark but her annoyed face shown clearly in the dark.

“That auto waala! Why do they get into the business if they can’t drive!”, she said uttering her first words on the table.

“What happened?”

“He took half an hour to carry me form college to here!”her anger now reflecting on me.

“It’s a heavy traffic outside, don’t let it bother you!”I tried continuing the conversation.

“Yeah whatever! They shouldn’t let these biharis drive auto-rickshaw any ways. You are the only good one I have ever met!” she said

“That’s because you haven’t met a lot of people. Just clam down and don’t let it get to your head, these ideas are poisonous.”

“Don’t be patronizing me! I am a grown up girl and understand life a lot better than you! Truth is harsh!”

“You are behaving as if I asked you to take that auto. Just clam down will you?”

We ordered our drinks in silence. After which she moved to exams and marks. Then circled back to how the outsiders in college have increased competition. I could not take it any longer. Either she was nurtured ugly or had grown crazy because whatever she mumbled made little sense. I tolerated her on railways and how Bihar is responsible for overpopulation after which I got sick.

“I think have  mixed wine in that Irish coffee I ordered. My head is spinning…”, I lied. At least it would get me a break.”I think I should call my friend, he is in a mall nearby”,I said taking out my phone.

“You are going to leave in 45 minutes!! I thought this was a date”

“Oh it was, but I am allergic to  white whine. I will call you later, we can go out sunday”, I said now deleting her number.

I got a rickshaw and bid her farewell. She would never grow up and waiting for her to change would only be painful. Young minds once adulterated with the poison of regionalism are difficult to cure. This is what all of us are doing in the country but  I am no philosopher.

I looked at the glittering road ahead, somewhere in these millions of Indians will be a better class of people be in company with.


–Inspired by  ” A Cosmopolite In A Cafe”  by O. Henry

The above story is not based on a true life but is derived from real life incidents occurring with different people. Readers are requested not to take it as an insult to their caste, community or region.

Being Illogical

It was a cold December night when the scientist climbed to the roof of his house. His face cold, his eyes hollow and his mind whirling as the world dissolved with each staggering step he took. Everything around him carried less meaning now than it had three years back when he moved into the town. A town that he had, after much reluctance, started loving much like every other thing that he had come across in life. But today was different. Today was his day of realization. He had not discovered anything new, no. In fact, he had never discovered anything valuable in his life and the others called him scientist just to please him. Today, however, was different as I mentioned before because today he had realized his mistakes.  He had realized what a fool he had been all his life and still been happy about it.

It all started with a book he was gifted at the age of 12- “How to stay forever happy”. Not the kind of book one buys at 12 but he had been a happy soul form his early days and he loved being himself. “Funny people all around that there is a need to write such books. At least, I am the sane one”, thought the scientist after finishing the first few pages. Much like his future predictions, this was not true either and much like his future predictions, he believed it firmly. The lawns of his school had started appearing greener when the scientist first saw the girl he liked. The winter mornings of the small Punjab town smelled sweeter with the dew and the view of the girl passing outside his house for school. “I am going to share my lunch with her today”, he thought four times before leaving the house, everyday. Months passed and so did the year but the scientist never said a word to the girl until lastly it was time to move to his hometown. Tears rolled down his eyes with the announcement with a smile as ruse . It is difficult to distinguish between joy and sorrow when the moods of people are different and the young teen understood this. On his journey back on train the scientist decided to earn a lot of money one day and come back to Punjab. To never again live the miserable life of dependence. Nature, however, got the better of him soon after he came to his new home.

A cold breeze brought the scientist back from his contemplation.  The mist around covered the world which he had grown neutral to. His failure in his profession was not what had haunted him. Nor did any human relation for he paid little heed to those around him. He had come to the realization that even after his refusal to admit his defeat, after all his efforts, he was a looser. That was the only way he saw to defend himself. All those great sayings defining a loser as someone who accepts his defeat are platitudes to one who has seen the small difference between a loss and a win. He had been above average in wits and passion. He had been overly and truly nice to people around him. And he had never shunned form responsibilities. These all never mattered however as the real world works in different ways.  He had loved the world around too much to see the ugly face of reality. The dark around showed the world in its true colors- black and white. Colors just add feelings to an otherwise simple world.  The secret was to stay alive and have no affection.  A mean world around lurched for those too soulful. He would go out tomorrow not because life was beautiful, but because it is important to be a winner. There were no reasons for that way of life, nor was there any reason to much that he had done up till that night. Too long a life had he wasted trying to reason. Reasons are created, reality exists. It was time he started admitting reality and not caring the facts.


Love Love and Love alone

This being the first entry in my blog, my ramblings may make a little more sense if I introduce the purpose of the posts in here first. I live in a room with three others and so the desk and bed is all I have in the name of privacy. And living with 700 males around you at half of your awake time can fuse some of the nerves which is when I blog. These two points are how the blog got its name.

One rule which I have decided to implement this time is not to use any kind of editing. The beauty may blemish because of an incoherent writing style, it seems the most human way to communicate in the end.

Enough about administration,  let us start with today’s post.  I have an exam on Signal Processing in less than 10 hours as I write this and only 30% of syllabus is covered till now. What I suspect is driving this madness of writing blogs is Oxytocin – to which I dedicate my first entry. Oxytocin, as many would know, is the neuromodulator in humans which initiates and sustains attraction and attachment. It is released in large quantities during childbirth, breastfeeding and anxiety.  Though the levels of Oxytocin are independent of the sex of person, age may affect as parent, for example, is more likely to have more affection and kindness towards children. Termed as ‘love hormone’ by companies, oxytocin has acquired the image of a natural Viagra which is far from reality. As noted before, this hormone has more to do with the emotions of emotional love than physical desires.

Love in psychology has come a long way since Adam and Eve. And for the poets, the biologists have completely destroyed the beauty of many a sonnets. Biologically, love evolves in three phases. Lust, attraction and attachment. The first two being obvious, attachment occurs as a result of high levels of oxytocin and vasopressin. This theory may have more scientific basis in the western world, my personal feelings tend to support the more feudal theory that dictates that love occurs because of basic human need for dependence. This (more simpler) paradigm for love more effective in explaining the love between parents and child and among siblings but fails to account for Freudian psychological theories such as that of Oedipus and Electra complex.

The Indian scenario is dominated by over-population and a need for survival with a shortage of resources. A rapidly advancing society increases the sense of insecurity among people leading to an early marriage age in country.

In conclusion, Love might be over-rated but so are most other things in life.I don’t think that this post is complete, but enough said. I am in a fight-or-flight situation.